It can be this simple…

Resolutions not required—sometimes all it takes is just an old kitchen towel.

Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash

There are two things that bum me out over the long (and getting longer) course of Holiday seasons nowadays: the first being the incessant bombardment of solicitations for money. I understand the intent behind most solicitations (at least those with a benevolent cause), but still, the pleas for funds grows wearisome especially since it feels like the bombardment begins two weeks before Halloween. I mean, I know it’s the giving season and all, but my goodness—I can only give “just $19.00 a month and get this cool t-shirt as our thanks” a few times before I run out of $19.00 a month to give. And I have too many t-shirts as it is.

So, that bums be out. When I choose to be bummed out that is (‘cuz that’s always a choice, completely within our control). And because I know better, I choose to be bummed not all that often anymore—even though it’s hard to avoid all solicitations. Fortunately, I never get solicited by my bird, squirrel, and tree friends when I’m sitting outside, unplugged, and next to our ponds where the only sound is the running water from our pump-generated waterfalls and brooks. Unless you count the pleas from the birds and squirrels for food, in which case I replenish their feeders—then they become happy again. And then me too. Meaningful giving can be given to more than just our human family members. At least I know where 100% of the giving goes when I give to our non-human family members who live among us here.

The second thing that bums me is the similarly incessant advice, freely (or not) given for New Year’s resolutions. We quickly pivot from “the giving season” to “the feel guilty” season when others attempt to tell us how to make “better resolutions for more lasting success.” Code for: “time now for me to make you feel guilty for not having the life you should be having right now, or looking the way you should be looking right now.” What’s worse is these are seductively subtle attempts (aka manipulations) to make us believe we are lesser than we are—that we are, in some way, unfortunate or impoverished in comparison to something more ideal (an ideal, btw, set by the industry or corporations themselves.) The whole thing is offensively obnoxious. It’s also its own BILLION dollar industry!

Beginning the first minute after midnight on December 26, the solicitations not so subtly turn from “giving to support my cause” to “buy my product and you’ll LOSE weight faster, KEEP it off longer, and LOOK much younger!” Have you caught on to the fact that most resolution-oriented solicitations have to do with our perceptions of body image? Of course you have, right? Pay attention to how we are preyed upon for our insecurities (actually, how those with something to sell COUNT on us being overly concerned with our insecurities. “Insecurities” is simply an unfortunate way of defining “just being human.” So, shame on them!) We funny humans can pay a lot to salve our insecurities, to attempt fixes for just being human. I could go on and on and on about that, but I won’t. I choose to not be bummed by it all. Besides, that’s not the reason for this post today.

The Reason for This Post Today:

There was a time when I first started blogging when I wondered if I’d run out of meaningful ideas to write about. Even when Dad was alive and living with us, I never wanted to fall into a writer’s trap of becoming redundant, uninteresting, or irrelevant. To combat that worry, I’ve become comfortable in my skin of “not worrying about competing for a reader’s attention.” Readers get to choose what they pay attention to (incessant solicitations notwithstanding), so writers are best advised to let go of worry and just write from the heart. If what one writes has its own inherent worth, then those words will find the readers they deserve. This is why I would write even were I the only one who reads them. I’m not—so I continue to be amazed and humbled that, even though my dad died in March, HE being the one who formed the initial intention and inspiration for this blog, the subscribers to this blog have continued to grow in number.

This post marks the final post of the 2023rd calendar year—the 129th post overall for me. I’ve loved writing each. For #129, I didn’t have an idea leading up to this week on what I felt needed to be written or put out into the Universe. But as I’ve written more, I’m learning to trust in something quite wonderful—that I really do not have to have a complete thought in mind ahead of placing my fingers on my keyboard to compose a post (or poem or article or memory). I’ve learned the Universe itself will provide the guidance—I just need to remain receptive. Once an idea surfaces, the words just seem to flow from a mysterious source, deeper and unknown. And I’ve come to trust the ideas will come—not always from me.

Case in point:

All the resolution I need.

I’m writing this on Wednesday morning, two days after Christmas. I had no idea what to write for today’s blog but I knew I didn’t want to push out more of the same that we’d all be reading at this time of year anyway—especially on the making of resolutions. And then the Universe placed in front of me a subtle message that at first went right past me; but resurfaced at 2am this morning (an occupational hazard for most writers—inspirations hit whenever they are ripe, not always when the writer is awake).

I haven’t “done” New Years’ resolutions in, like, forever. I find them absurdly funny and obnoxious. And sad. But I am tuned-in to a constant practice of living my highest life in ways that are meaningful, authentic, and of best service to others whenever possible. So when I approach my life, all its inherent moments, from a place of awareness and reverence, then I find I end my days with a deeply felt sense of satisfaction and equanimity. If all things, all moments, are viewed as sacred, then what needs to be improved? I just need to live them well, is all. And live them fully.

So this old kitchen towel was all I needed as a reminder of my practice. It was the one I grabbed from our kitchen drawer to replace the one I had been using at our espresso-making station. For some reason (a good reason as it turned out), my eyes paused upon the words and I saw them anew. It is all the resolution I need for the coming next year, and even for the rest of my life. If I can remember to fall back upon these three things as my foundational principles, even during all the inevitable tough times, then I think I will have lived each day, each moment, well.

And again, that’s all I’m trying to do.

Here’s How I’m Gonna Do it:

I’ll call it “Old Kitchen Towel Wisdom.”

Live Every Moment:

“Live” being an active verb. VERY active. Too often we “get lived” by the moments themselves, or by other’s intentions for how THEY think we should live. Moments all too often slip right past us unnoticed—or worse, our attention gets drawn to moments that do us no good, and that might even cause us harm (I’m talking the latest in digital trends now: “doom-scrolling!”). So to combat living in a robotic, habitual haze, I choose to actively LIVE each moment as fully as possible by bringing a sense of agency and intentionality and reverence and sacredness to each moment. Even the mundane ones. I aim to Live by Being, not just, or only, by doing.

Laugh Everyday:

Lord knows there is enough happening in our world that can spark anger and sadness and bewilderment and even complacency; too many people who want us to be pissed off about something that we forget our common humanness—nothing is so important that should take us away from seeing the miracle (and human) within each of us; no matter our ethnicity, skin color, political persuasion, tribal affiliations, country of origin, or sexual identity (there IS one glaring exception, however, but I’ll save that for a future post). There is WAY too much to cry about in our world right now—so we need to remember to laugh. Laugh—if for no other reason than to see the absurdity in it all. Because soon enough, none of us will be alive to even care (though with luck, our children will. But good luck to them then.) So, I’ll try to laugh everyday; and try helping others to do the same. I may have to add this to my end-of-day reflections—until, at least, it becomes automatic. No one says on their death bed: “I shouldn’t have laughed so much.”

My Dad certainly didn’t say that.

When was the last time you laughed? I mean, REALLY laughed? It feels good, right? We should always be in a place where we can remember our last laugh. And look forward to the next one—just around the bend there.

Love With All Your Heart:

Self-explanatory. I hope.

And God do I hope!

So that’s it!

This is all I need. If I remember, in six months or so, I’ll post an update on my progress. I’m gonna live these principles as my guiding lights from now on—and not for just this coming year. They’re not my only ones; I have more guiding, northern lights in my life. We all need as much light as we can get nowadays—that which we gain from others, and that which we can create ourselves. But LIVE, LAUGH, AND LOVE…yeah, they’ll do nicely to make my days brighter.

Wish me luck and godspeed do you? Then, thank you. Even though I shouldn’t need it. Live, Laugh, and Love—I don’t see how anyone could need anything more. (Outside of homemade vegan whole wheat blueberry muffins and SFV oatmilk lattes, that is.)

Live, Laugh, and Love. Hmmm…

I can’t help but wonder how our world might be different, if only….

Yeah, if only.

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Always and Ubuntu,

~ k

🙏🏼

And Ahimsa!

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

Here’s to Living, Laughing, and Loving!

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