Such a rich post to read this morning early while it's still dark and quiet. You touch my thoughts and feelings in much the same way. This:" I have about 30 drafts of essays in various stages of completion, but none of those felt right to finish for today. Maybe later, maybe. Today’s world is giving a lot of us a lot that could be thought about, for sure. But I wasn’t thinking about anything in particular... And there's always something to feel about."
I try and get a post up about once a week but not wed to every Friday or Monday per se. I know that honoring a commitment and a promise to self are important and I know too that I prefer being flexible and adaptable. Schedules are great for flying. I don't write or do very much else on a schedule except perhaps wake up every day so far and make the most of it without regard for what time it is. I try to continue the 3 pages exercise every morning before launching into answering and
commenting for a couple of hours. Then I work on the next draft as the spirit moves me. Yes, we have something from nothing, the miracle of creating. Thanks, Kert!
As always, Gary, a very thoughtful and affirming response. “The miracle of creating” is made more beautiful when someone notices. I notice, of course, but I know you know the feeling one gets when someone else pauses to take in what you’ve done, made sense of it, applied it to their own lives (and with hope made better because of it even in some small way), then responds with depth and appreciation themselves.
YOU do that for me and I thank you for that! Never expected; always appreciated; only when you are so moved by the spirit. 🙏🏼
Grateful to be one who gets to be part of your pool parties and barbecues ☀️ One of many reasons we are all blessed to be in your family circle. See you tomorrow to celebrate our Eli ❤️
In the end, it was enough and more. I love, "And there is always something to feel about." Yes! Yes! Yes! And I'm interested in your hospice volunteer work - did you start that after your dad died? Do you think/feel that your experience with your dad gave you the desire to help others with the process of dying? And I also want to say, after reading your posts, I always feel lighter, even when there's been heavy stuff.
Thank you Cherie, as always. That’s a beautiful question, about Hospice, as it’s become a passion of mine. I knew years ago, as I was just beginning to contemplate what I would do when I retired from education, that it would involve Hospice work of some kind. I’ve been privileged over time to be in the presence of dying people—my mom and dad, other family, even some students who had catastrophic illnesses or trauma (so privileged to have been invited by their parents to be a part of their family during those heartbreaking times—the privilege of a lifetime). I discovered I had an ease and affinity to be in the presence of dying and death so I started intentionally to study and read further into it. There is a local hospital that has a renowned Hospice center on it’s campus that I knew I was going to be a part of some day. We moved my dad over to my home and intended to have him in their Hospice when the time came. It came. And how he was cared for, with such care and compassion, only made me more resolute to do that work. A couple months after my Dad’s funeral, I trained with them and became a volunteer. It’s been so rewarding.
That is so interesting. It is very appealing to me, if that's the correct word, and that you describe it as the privilege of a lifetime feels right to me. I don't have the experience to know if I have an ease with it, but I have talked with people who have been with loved ones when they died and found myself asking questions and thinking about the process they described. You said you intentionally studied and read - do you have any reading suggestions if I want to check into this further?
Oh I could go on and on with things to read. There are a lot of good things to read about Hospice itself on the internet if you are interested in doing some basic research. Here’s a good starting point on the four women who were the initial movers and shakers of the Hospice philosophy
If you are interested in the larger scope of aging, dying, and death, then I would point you initially to two books—The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski. Awake at the Bedside by Koshin Paley Ellison. And if you want a deeply felt and heartbreaking memoir, I would point you to When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi.
I received additional caregiver training at San Francisco’s Zen Hospice Project—a world renowned Hospice that implemented some amazing innovations for end of life care and caregiving. Related to that, there is an amazing TEDTalk by Dr. BJ Miller titled “What Really Matters at the End of Life. I guarantee it will blow you away! I watch it at least a half a dozen times a year.
I could go on Cherie. If you have the inkling of any kind of calling in this area, please pursue it. You will be rewarded—if you coordinate with a local Hospice, there are many things you can do, as a volunteer, to support the work of the palliative clinicians and patient. It doesn’t have to necessarily be sitting at the bedside of the dying person. And please DM or email me if you want to continue this conversation. I have more that I have read that has been transformative. Our society does not “do death” well—and I want to play a small part in helping others to go through the journey better. That’s what I offered my father, and I’ve never regretted a single thing (I wrote a lot about that in the Substack blog’s past entries.)
You’re a true gem! I know we’d resonate with each other should we ever meet in person. I can tell you are a generous and caring/compassionate soul. My kind of person.
Kert, thank you so much for this! I will definitely check out the links, TEDTalk, and books you've suggested and see how that goes. It really is just an inkling so far, but I may very well DM or email you at some point for further conversation. Thank you for that option. I truly appreciate you taking the time to share all of this to get me started. I agree, our society doesn't do death well and I would like to help change that in some way, or at the very least, change that for myself and my family. And oh yes, you are my kind of person as well! I'm grateful to have connected with you and look forward to much more! Thank you again!!
A great analogy that. Poetry doesn’t take one out of the water; indeed, that’s the Source of all poetry—the waves, the tide, the currents, the ripples, the boiling. The best of it, and from writing it, does allow one to breathe.
I love that in the simplicity of no plan you found flow and feeling. Sometimes the void of no plan mean that what we really are experiencing has space to emerge and what you were experiencing is straight up existing in a human body with thought and feeling. Lovely. I love the chainsaw and the birdsong too - relatable.
Such a rich post to read this morning early while it's still dark and quiet. You touch my thoughts and feelings in much the same way. This:" I have about 30 drafts of essays in various stages of completion, but none of those felt right to finish for today. Maybe later, maybe. Today’s world is giving a lot of us a lot that could be thought about, for sure. But I wasn’t thinking about anything in particular... And there's always something to feel about."
I try and get a post up about once a week but not wed to every Friday or Monday per se. I know that honoring a commitment and a promise to self are important and I know too that I prefer being flexible and adaptable. Schedules are great for flying. I don't write or do very much else on a schedule except perhaps wake up every day so far and make the most of it without regard for what time it is. I try to continue the 3 pages exercise every morning before launching into answering and
commenting for a couple of hours. Then I work on the next draft as the spirit moves me. Yes, we have something from nothing, the miracle of creating. Thanks, Kert!
As always, Gary, a very thoughtful and affirming response. “The miracle of creating” is made more beautiful when someone notices. I notice, of course, but I know you know the feeling one gets when someone else pauses to take in what you’ve done, made sense of it, applied it to their own lives (and with hope made better because of it even in some small way), then responds with depth and appreciation themselves.
YOU do that for me and I thank you for that! Never expected; always appreciated; only when you are so moved by the spirit. 🙏🏼
Grateful to be one who gets to be part of your pool parties and barbecues ☀️ One of many reasons we are all blessed to be in your family circle. See you tomorrow to celebrate our Eli ❤️
You’ve misrepresented just there the one who is blessed! LOL!!!
Pool’s officially open!!! Gonna be warm the next couple days…just saying.
And as usual, thank you LeAnn—you get it, you know.
In the end, it was enough and more. I love, "And there is always something to feel about." Yes! Yes! Yes! And I'm interested in your hospice volunteer work - did you start that after your dad died? Do you think/feel that your experience with your dad gave you the desire to help others with the process of dying? And I also want to say, after reading your posts, I always feel lighter, even when there's been heavy stuff.
Thank you Cherie, as always. That’s a beautiful question, about Hospice, as it’s become a passion of mine. I knew years ago, as I was just beginning to contemplate what I would do when I retired from education, that it would involve Hospice work of some kind. I’ve been privileged over time to be in the presence of dying people—my mom and dad, other family, even some students who had catastrophic illnesses or trauma (so privileged to have been invited by their parents to be a part of their family during those heartbreaking times—the privilege of a lifetime). I discovered I had an ease and affinity to be in the presence of dying and death so I started intentionally to study and read further into it. There is a local hospital that has a renowned Hospice center on it’s campus that I knew I was going to be a part of some day. We moved my dad over to my home and intended to have him in their Hospice when the time came. It came. And how he was cared for, with such care and compassion, only made me more resolute to do that work. A couple months after my Dad’s funeral, I trained with them and became a volunteer. It’s been so rewarding.
Thank you again for asking!
That is so interesting. It is very appealing to me, if that's the correct word, and that you describe it as the privilege of a lifetime feels right to me. I don't have the experience to know if I have an ease with it, but I have talked with people who have been with loved ones when they died and found myself asking questions and thinking about the process they described. You said you intentionally studied and read - do you have any reading suggestions if I want to check into this further?
Oh I could go on and on with things to read. There are a lot of good things to read about Hospice itself on the internet if you are interested in doing some basic research. Here’s a good starting point on the four women who were the initial movers and shakers of the Hospice philosophy
https://enclarapharmacia.com/womens-history-month-recognizing-four-founders-of-hospice-care
If you are interested in the larger scope of aging, dying, and death, then I would point you initially to two books—The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski. Awake at the Bedside by Koshin Paley Ellison. And if you want a deeply felt and heartbreaking memoir, I would point you to When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi.
I received additional caregiver training at San Francisco’s Zen Hospice Project—a world renowned Hospice that implemented some amazing innovations for end of life care and caregiving. Related to that, there is an amazing TEDTalk by Dr. BJ Miller titled “What Really Matters at the End of Life. I guarantee it will blow you away! I watch it at least a half a dozen times a year.
https://www.ted.com/talks/bj_miller_what_really_matters_at_the_end_of_life
I could go on Cherie. If you have the inkling of any kind of calling in this area, please pursue it. You will be rewarded—if you coordinate with a local Hospice, there are many things you can do, as a volunteer, to support the work of the palliative clinicians and patient. It doesn’t have to necessarily be sitting at the bedside of the dying person. And please DM or email me if you want to continue this conversation. I have more that I have read that has been transformative. Our society does not “do death” well—and I want to play a small part in helping others to go through the journey better. That’s what I offered my father, and I’ve never regretted a single thing (I wrote a lot about that in the Substack blog’s past entries.)
You’re a true gem! I know we’d resonate with each other should we ever meet in person. I can tell you are a generous and caring/compassionate soul. My kind of person.
Kert, thank you so much for this! I will definitely check out the links, TEDTalk, and books you've suggested and see how that goes. It really is just an inkling so far, but I may very well DM or email you at some point for further conversation. Thank you for that option. I truly appreciate you taking the time to share all of this to get me started. I agree, our society doesn't do death well and I would like to help change that in some way, or at the very least, change that for myself and my family. And oh yes, you are my kind of person as well! I'm grateful to have connected with you and look forward to much more! Thank you again!!
So sorry to hear about Yorkie, Kert.
Very kind of you Diana, thank you.
So many truths you have shared… need to re-read for a deeper dive and let your words settle in. Glad to have found your page
I return the affirmation and appreciation—funny how community works in this space of kindred writers.
And I love the poetic structure of Haiku—you are good at it!
Thank you 🙏☺️ they are short, sweet, and to the point like my girl - why I enjoy writing haiku.
Poetry in all forms helps keep my head above water. Your words resonate with me.
A great analogy that. Poetry doesn’t take one out of the water; indeed, that’s the Source of all poetry—the waves, the tide, the currents, the ripples, the boiling. The best of it, and from writing it, does allow one to breathe.
I love that in the simplicity of no plan you found flow and feeling. Sometimes the void of no plan mean that what we really are experiencing has space to emerge and what you were experiencing is straight up existing in a human body with thought and feeling. Lovely. I love the chainsaw and the birdsong too - relatable.