Love this my friend. As someone with a similar background in Catholicism your words resonate with me. I am still trying to figure out my path but kindness and generosity are at the heart of it. Seeking the path of the dance seems a pretty good path to me.
Thank you for this beautiful soliloquy. Your journey is very similar to mine. My time with inherited religion finally ended when the new priest threatened to excommunicate me as a rabble rouser for trying to stop his efforts to build a fabulous church in lieu of expanding the current communal hall where all our activities were held. He actually expected people to take an extra mortgage out on their houses to pay for it!. I have since found my way to Buddhism and I have never before been this content. When a person relinquishes his fear of death then LIFE becomes known to him. Organized religion, to me, is merely a way to control people and that this something that I abhor. I revel in discovering the individualism of every person I meet. Buddhism now teaches me how to SEE that energy and how it is interwoven in EVERYTHING.
This comment, Barbara, is worthy of its own Post! Exquisite! We are kindred spirits—I found a home in Zen Buddhism myself. “I revel in discovering the individualism of every person I meet.” Can you imagine if we all acted that way? No more wars, no more violence—we’d be too busy bowing down in honor to each other for anything else to arise other than respect and love.
I resonate with so much of this post, Kert. Except, of course, "the altar boys", but all three of my brothers were. I used to say I was a recovering Catholic, but then one day it didn't land right inside of me. It felt offensive, even though I was no longer a practicing Catholic. I decided to hold onto what felt truly genuine about the faith and let the rest go.
I appreciate the Lila reference that life is a play and a dance, and finding our dance partners is essential for our well-being and living in this world.
I appreciate your thoughts about the word “recovering.” Thank you for offering that to me. I’ve battled that word myself over the years. Yet, I’ve intentionally kept the characterization. I was helped in my reflections by a friend who disclosed to me he was one of the alter boys who was assaulted in Boston—he was my age. Given what I’ve learned about so much of the orthodoxy, patriarchy, power, control, and dogma (even to this day) of the Church, to say nothing of the coverups of the sexual assaults and pedophilia (let alone those heinous crimes themselves perpetrated by the clergy), I realize how close I might have come to being a victim—if not to Clergy predators, than to my continuing on as “one of the faithful” by either turning a blind eye to it all, or not believing any of it was happening. I HAD to leave the Church, much to my mother’s HUGE dismay. Kids were abused; their lives destroyed. And the hierarchy knew about it all. When I realized I was ashamed and embarrassed to be associated with the Church, I realized I had to set out on a path of recovery to turn away from everything I was taught about God, to finding God in everything else that had nothing whatsoever to do with religion. THAT has been a lot of reprogramming that I’m pretty sure I’m not quite finished with.
An aside: have you seen the AMAZING movie “Spotlight?” In my humble opinion, every Catholic, recovering Catholic, non-practicing (nod to you!) Catholic, and non-Catholic should watch it.
Yes! I think my claiming 'recovering Catholic' came from a similar well of shock, despair, sadness, anger, and confusion. When my best friend's son was killed in a car accident - he was struck by a truck driver who was hopped up on meds to keep him awake - she soon converted to Catholicism. I saw how turning to the faith saved her, literally. I think that's when I shifted how I felt and spoke about my path.
Spotlight was the last film I saw with my mother, oddly enough. I remember sitting with her afterwards, having a cup of coffee, and discussing the film. What she was aware of, what we both became more aware of, and so on. It was not easy to have a conversation with her. I think she must have been in her late 80s then, but she kept up with the news and had an open mind. So, she took it in and was just as appalled as I.
You are a blessing, thank you. I understand your friend’s conversion to Catholicism, and am so grateful its teachings brought such needed peace and solace—THAT is when Faith is at its very best. And we all need a Faith like that in something. I work hard at not judging another’s path choices, but am imperfect at it.
Although my mom was alive when Spotlight was released, she didn’t see it and would have refused to do so even if I encouraged it. The Boston Globe did incredible work with all that. I went into their archives to read the actual articles which lead to additional research to look up the names of priest offenders in my state/county. I unknowingly served as a eucharistic minister and lector when I was a college student to one; and my wife had a distant cousin/priest who resigned from the priesthood under questionable circumstances.
Ah, the stories we have and could tell. So we put them on Substack or in Notes comments! LOL!
Yes, yes, yes! Funny you should say that about your mom. My dad refused to go with us, but bless her heart, my mom knew it would be painful, but she wanted to be informed. I sure miss her.
And yes, to those stories we get to share here in Substackland. And yes to those we're not ready to share.
Love this my friend. As someone with a similar background in Catholicism your words resonate with me. I am still trying to figure out my path but kindness and generosity are at the heart of it. Seeking the path of the dance seems a pretty good path to me.
Thank you Matthew. No one can be against kindness and gratitude. Especially if one is a dog owner. LOL!
What is there to do
when the Christ’s Cross gets hijacked?
Breathe, learn, love, bow, dance!
The Dance IS the thing!
All of Life is the music;
Let’s Dance together.
Thank you for this beautiful soliloquy. Your journey is very similar to mine. My time with inherited religion finally ended when the new priest threatened to excommunicate me as a rabble rouser for trying to stop his efforts to build a fabulous church in lieu of expanding the current communal hall where all our activities were held. He actually expected people to take an extra mortgage out on their houses to pay for it!. I have since found my way to Buddhism and I have never before been this content. When a person relinquishes his fear of death then LIFE becomes known to him. Organized religion, to me, is merely a way to control people and that this something that I abhor. I revel in discovering the individualism of every person I meet. Buddhism now teaches me how to SEE that energy and how it is interwoven in EVERYTHING.
This comment, Barbara, is worthy of its own Post! Exquisite! We are kindred spirits—I found a home in Zen Buddhism myself. “I revel in discovering the individualism of every person I meet.” Can you imagine if we all acted that way? No more wars, no more violence—we’d be too busy bowing down in honor to each other for anything else to arise other than respect and love.
Thank you for including Hafez’s poetry! For me the Cosmos is the God Concept… my thoughts dance within the stars. ✨💫💃🪩💫✨
That’s why we found each other here in Substackistan. Kindred spirits.
I resonate with so much of this post, Kert. Except, of course, "the altar boys", but all three of my brothers were. I used to say I was a recovering Catholic, but then one day it didn't land right inside of me. It felt offensive, even though I was no longer a practicing Catholic. I decided to hold onto what felt truly genuine about the faith and let the rest go.
I appreciate the Lila reference that life is a play and a dance, and finding our dance partners is essential for our well-being and living in this world.
I appreciate your thoughts about the word “recovering.” Thank you for offering that to me. I’ve battled that word myself over the years. Yet, I’ve intentionally kept the characterization. I was helped in my reflections by a friend who disclosed to me he was one of the alter boys who was assaulted in Boston—he was my age. Given what I’ve learned about so much of the orthodoxy, patriarchy, power, control, and dogma (even to this day) of the Church, to say nothing of the coverups of the sexual assaults and pedophilia (let alone those heinous crimes themselves perpetrated by the clergy), I realize how close I might have come to being a victim—if not to Clergy predators, than to my continuing on as “one of the faithful” by either turning a blind eye to it all, or not believing any of it was happening. I HAD to leave the Church, much to my mother’s HUGE dismay. Kids were abused; their lives destroyed. And the hierarchy knew about it all. When I realized I was ashamed and embarrassed to be associated with the Church, I realized I had to set out on a path of recovery to turn away from everything I was taught about God, to finding God in everything else that had nothing whatsoever to do with religion. THAT has been a lot of reprogramming that I’m pretty sure I’m not quite finished with.
An aside: have you seen the AMAZING movie “Spotlight?” In my humble opinion, every Catholic, recovering Catholic, non-practicing (nod to you!) Catholic, and non-Catholic should watch it.
Yes! I think my claiming 'recovering Catholic' came from a similar well of shock, despair, sadness, anger, and confusion. When my best friend's son was killed in a car accident - he was struck by a truck driver who was hopped up on meds to keep him awake - she soon converted to Catholicism. I saw how turning to the faith saved her, literally. I think that's when I shifted how I felt and spoke about my path.
Spotlight was the last film I saw with my mother, oddly enough. I remember sitting with her afterwards, having a cup of coffee, and discussing the film. What she was aware of, what we both became more aware of, and so on. It was not easy to have a conversation with her. I think she must have been in her late 80s then, but she kept up with the news and had an open mind. So, she took it in and was just as appalled as I.
You are a blessing, thank you. I understand your friend’s conversion to Catholicism, and am so grateful its teachings brought such needed peace and solace—THAT is when Faith is at its very best. And we all need a Faith like that in something. I work hard at not judging another’s path choices, but am imperfect at it.
Although my mom was alive when Spotlight was released, she didn’t see it and would have refused to do so even if I encouraged it. The Boston Globe did incredible work with all that. I went into their archives to read the actual articles which lead to additional research to look up the names of priest offenders in my state/county. I unknowingly served as a eucharistic minister and lector when I was a college student to one; and my wife had a distant cousin/priest who resigned from the priesthood under questionable circumstances.
Ah, the stories we have and could tell. So we put them on Substack or in Notes comments! LOL!
🙏🏼 Peace to you today my friend.
Yes, yes, yes! Funny you should say that about your mom. My dad refused to go with us, but bless her heart, my mom knew it would be painful, but she wanted to be informed. I sure miss her.
And yes, to those stories we get to share here in Substackland. And yes to those we're not ready to share.
Thank you, Kert. I appreciate you.